Columnist offers sage advice on marriage

‘Senior Living’ by Carl Hendrickson: True love doesn’t grow old, doesn’t die, columnist says

The Hendricksons

The Hendricksons

By Carl Hendrickson

It came in the mail.

There among the bills and junk mail was the invitation. The eldest son of my wife’s brother was getting married this month.

Why not? June is the most popular month for marriages.

June is named after the ancient goddess, Juno. She was the goddess of marriage, and accordingly many Romans chose to have their marriage in June to honor her.

It was considered the most favorable time to wed and the happy couple would be showered with luck and good wishes from the goddess.

We also have received a listing of where the young couple is registered. My wife, like many women, will be guided by this listing to purchase a gift for the young couple. And, this is proper, for the couple needs material goods to begin their new life together.

But I shall provide them with the wisdom that shall sustain them through marriage.

With half of marriages failing today, couples need advice and wisdom more than material objects.

So, Brian and Tina, I shall give you the advice of one who has been wed for half a century as a wedding gift. Today, it will be little appreciated because you were expecting material goods, but in the years to come you shall realize the importance of receiving advice from those of us who have lived years through the joys and the hardships of married life.

When I wed, marriage was in fashion.

Husbands and wives were committed to spend a lifetime together.

Today, matrimony no longer is in vogue.

There no longer is a long-term commitment as can be seen by the alarming statistics. One of every two marriages is failing.

Far too many young couples go through the ceremony with a romantic, unrealistic view of marriage. Like the movie, “The Wizard of Oz,” young couples plan on marching hand in hand down a yellow brick road thinking there will be a Wizard who will solve all their problems.

Just as Dorothy and her friends found that there was no Wizard, in marriage there is no yellow brick road, no Wizard and no easy solutions.

A marriage license is not a guarantee for happiness or longevity. Love has to be nurtured and tended to if it is to grow and be available when needed in the difficult times.

I have found as I have grown old that there is an awesome mystery about real love that has never quite been captured by authors, poets or artists. Genuine love is active. It is two people growing individually and in unity.

Its dynamism cannot be diminished by the passing of years or the shifting of circumstances. True love is a durable fire, burning forever. Love does not grow old, nor does it die.

Brian and Tina, treasure the simplest things that occur in your marriage.

The grand events will come, such as the birth of a child, and you will feel pride.

However, when you need comfort and direction, it often will be found in the simple things.

Marriage will temper and refine you both. By working at having a successful, loving relationship, marriage will take you to great heights. It is my wish that you are able to reach the stars.

It is possible, for I have seen it in my marriage.